“I’ve never been consistent and that was the problem. “
I think this is blog relaunch number three. I’ve been inconsistent. I’ve been growing. I’ve been changing. I’ve been sad. Depressed. Anxious. I had to take so many steps back to regain myself that it took so long for me to get back on my feet. I had to let myself truly break in order to become a better version of myself. While I don’t feel quite there yet I’m so proud of myself for – the strides I’ve taken to change my environment, my situation, to begin and continue to heal, to accept the things I cannot change, learn to love and let others back in again, cope with negative thoughts and bad habits, and more importantly to love myself again.
I’ll admit, I’ve been at my worst. 2016-2018 were probably the two hardest years of my life for many reasons. Part of me wants to share all of it with you all and most of me wants to forget it, but what I’ve realized is everything that has happened throughout my life is me. It’s helped me become who I am currently and right now, I’m happy with myself. I feel like most days I can stand on my own two feet again. I feel stronger and happier. I feel more validated and supported than I have been in a long time, and I have an amazing group of the most positive people around me. Even though those two years were difficult and at times I felt like I couldn’t make it, I think I’ve finally have found the light at the end of that tunnel. I can’t even begin to tell you how much of a difficult time it has been. I questioned my worth. I hit ground zero. I had to literally cry myself to sleep, I coped in the most unhealthy ways, tolerated toxic people, stayed in negative situations, and I felt trapped. I didn’t know how to get out until I reached my breaking point. I don’t regret anything other than wishing I was strong enough to change some situations sooner.
I know I’ve been on and off with my passion projects and that’s always been hard for me. I don’t think I’ve been able to fully commit to anything I really wanted to build due to a lot of situations. Maybe it wasn’t the right time for this or that, but I do believe there’s no better time than now. I know more about who I am. My values. What makes me happiest. What I need to feel appreciated and fulfilled. I have support and finally the TIME. There’s no better time than now because I have a lot more to say and share and I’m no longer afraid to do it. I’m not afraid to be vulnerable or let you all in. Or share both the things that truly excite me and the things that I struggle with at the same time.
Regaining me is all about embracing myself and all that I am. I can’t just show the happy moments or the Instagram snapshots. I owe it to myself and to everyone who’s continued to be here and support me the most honest parts of myself and it’s not always beautiful but this is my life.
Welcome back to my blog. It’s going to be an amazing ride. Here’s what’s coming:
- Fashion and OOTD’s (Street fashion is my literal fave so expect to see more blog posts all around my favorite outfits)
- Mental Health Awareness – Struggling with depression, PTSD, and anxiety is a daily part of my life and I think there’s needs to be more conversations about it.
- Travel – I mean, cause who doesn’t love some good travel inspiration
- Concert Recaps – Get ready cause 2019 and 2020 are about to be no joke.
- Music Reviews
- Life & Advice
- Lifestyle Content
I’m excited. Thanks for staying with me for all these years and for all my new friends I hope you stick along for the ride.